Mum of one, Aiysha, 25, was struggling with a bedtime routine for her young daughter and was referred to Home-Start Bradford District through the Stronger Families worker at the Job Centre.
When Home-Start Bradford District’s Trudi came into Aiysha’s life, she did so much more than help with bedtime!
Aiysha’s Story
My daughter, Belle, is on the autism pathway and I was having such a struggle getting her to bed on a night – if we tried to put her in her own bed, she would having meltdowns resulting in hurting herself and us. We would have to keep her in the lounge with us until she exhausted herself and fell asleep, but as soon as we moved her, the meltdown would start again – she wouldn’t even settle if we laid down in her bedroom with her. When I raised my concerns with Lesley, my key worker at Stronger Families, she suggested the support of Home-Start Bradford District.
At first it seemed a little overwhelming and scary to have someone step into your life to support you. I felt like I was going to be judged by my parenting, I thought that people would think I wasn’t a good enough mum because I had someone to help me! I even thought that having someone involved was going to add more stress to my life.
But honestly having Trudi there to help me was a huge weight of my shoulders.
At first Trudi’s support was over the telephone as we were just coming out of Covid-19 and she suggested I join Autism groups on Facebook to ask for tips and advice. The group members suggested that she may not be comfortable in her bedroom, so we moved things around, got a sleep projector with calming music and other items which improved her attitude towards her bedroom. Trudi then got us a safety gate, so we could stop Belle from leaving the bedroom and gave us tips on slowly removing ourselves from her bedroom once she started sleeping in her bed.
Belle’s bedtime routine improved, but Trudi’s support did not end there.
Trudi also suggested other areas she could support me in like being able to take Belle to playgroups, so she could ease into social interaction with other children before starting nursery. Trudi then rang around Clayton and found a quiet story group session in a library near me. Trudi explained the challenges Belle had and the staff at the library were so understanding and accommodating.
Once Belle started nursery, she was a lot more tolerant with being around other children thanks to Trudi’s suggestion.
Trudi also made herself available for me any time I needed her. She made us some pec cards for Belle, brought us some toys, a table and chairs which Belle loves having in her bedroom to play on.
Trudi always volunteered to do more than she was required to do, for example she wanted to be involved in speech and language appointments to help me express my concerns about Belle – I sometimes didn’t know how to explain her behaviours to the outside world.
She also gave me the number for the child development centre to make sure Belle’s referral was being processed.
Trudi has made such an impact on our lives. I am so thankful that she was there to help and support both of us. She gave me the confidence to be able to go to a parent/children centred group. Trudi came with us when she was able to and metaphorically held my hand until I had the confidence to be able to take Belle on my own.
Trudi truly went above and beyond my expectations and I will never be able to forget her and will always be so thankful for everything she did for us.
If families are struggling and feel like you’re alone, please accept the help from Home-Start Bradford District – you will not look back!
